第20章 石头的尴尬(2 / 2)

大家一头雾水.......

“......你们也太不把石头当回事了,....要我看呐,石头就是妥妥的捂裆派.....你们看,一直到现在,不还是捂着的嘛......”

众人听完是哈哈大笑......

“.....对,没,还是大伟说的对,....捂裆派....名副其实......毫争议.......少林武当嘛,那可是名门大派呀......这才配得起咱们石头的名号来.......”

“.....行了行了,都别他妈的废话了....你们笑也笑了......都快帮我找找......”石头让大家帮忙找找他那很诡异的内裤.......

“.....我不是说了吗?....你那粉色内裤恐怕早就被水老鼠给偷走了,这上哪找去.......你说说你也是,一个大男人,怎么就这么骚气呢,穿个这么鲜艳的内裤,太打眼,就像你现在这样,辣眼睛.....我估计那些水老鼠实在是受不了了,才会出此下策.......你倒好,穿什么不好,非穿个米老鼠的,你说那些个水老鼠能不受刺激吗?能不受诱惑吗?看到了能不生气吗.....你这不是在拉仇恨吗?.....你再换位思考一下,如果你是水老鼠,你看到了,你是不是也得这么干呀?......你呀,就知足吧....没给你咬掉就是够给你面子的了........记住,下次下水之前一定要好好的检查检查内裤,别再穿的这么花枝招展的,小心它们报复你,下狠手,那就不划算了......我这也是为你好........“

大伟一副假装正经的样子让石头很是语,明明知道是在戏弄自己,但是好像又挑不出毛病来.......

“......行了行了,你就别再这假惺惺的了.....你赶紧给我弄一条去....”石头催促道。

“......你说的倒是轻松,我上哪给你弄去,你瞧瞧你那大肚子,不知道的还以为你怀的是三胞胎,你再看看在场的这些个男的,就没一个你能穿的了的,总不能给你弄一条老娘们的吧?.........再说了,就你那内裤,五大三粗的,都可以给大家当裙子穿了.........你看看老韩头的行不行?.....“

大伟问道......

石头连连摆手,一脸的嫌弃....”......那哪行呀,你没看老韩头一米八的大个,就他那大裤衩子,都快把我整个人给包住了......再说了,老韩头可不是个省油的灯,不少的花花肠子,我害怕穿了他的内裤得花柳病......“

大伟奈的摇了摇头.....

“.....你呀,都什么时候了,还挑三拣四的,要我看,你两一个德行,正好,以毒攻毒......有条穿的就不了.....你还不愿意穿,人家老韩头还不一定给你呢?......你就这么地吧.....再说了,又不是别人,乡里乡亲的,你就这么一路狂奔吧,没人会笑话你的,反正又不是不认识.......就当是给大家来一场免费的真人秀.....这好歹也是个人体艺术,你就当是为艺术献身了......没什么大不了的.....老爷们嘛,说不定会有更多的小姑娘看上你哟.......那可就是走桃花运了.......说不定你到时候还会感谢我的哟......但是你得小心点,咱们这狗太多,还凶,小心你那破玩意出去就被狗咬了,那可就亏大发了.........“大伟打趣道。

“.....还感谢?....说的天花乱坠的,你倒是是给我裸奔一个呀,你也太不拿我当回事了,你别看我小个不高,二百多斤,我也是个要面子的人,这种丢人现眼的事我能干吗?那丢人都丢到姥姥家去了....你让我以后还咋混呐.......我不管,反正是你拉我上去的,跟你也有责任......你也脱不了干系.......你得给我想想办法,要是找不到你也得光着............”

“...那你说咋办?......我好心拉你上来..你怎么还赖上我了......早知道就不拉你上来了,让你在水里泡着,跟老鼠作伴........你看看你,同样都是个人,你怎么就长这么胖,人家都是往上面长,你就尽往横着长,我看你就差加个尾巴了.....在场的,没有一个合适的,根本就穿不进去......这样吧,我口袋里还有个黑色的小塑料袋,你对付对付......“

说完,大伟就从口袋里掏出一个黑色的塑料袋,石头看了一眼,蒙圈了.....

“.....你开玩笑的吧....就这小破塑料袋,根本就遮不住......”

“....我说你是眼神不好使呀,还是脑子不好使,我哪是给你穿的,这么小,你能穿上吗?....我那是给你套在头上的,这样就没人知道是你了,你不就可以一路狂奔了吗?.......”

看着大伟一副假正经的样子,石头知道这明显就是在戏弄自己......于是气不打一处来....

“....大伟,我就知道你小子是故意的,没憋什么好屁....我今天已经对你很客气了......再这样就没意思了......你够了没有......”

大伟苦笑着说道.....“....你呀,真的是狗咬吕洞宾,不识好人心,我这也是关心你.你又不是没干过,装什么装,上次是谁头上套个袋子就在路边撒尿的.......”

大伟一边说,一边四处张望,当看到一处小水沟的时候,突然眼前一亮......

“.......有了,你等等....”

原来是大伟发现了几片荷叶,于是灵机一动,过去摘了两片最大的荷叶过来.......

“.......这下总可以了吧,这两片荷叶够大,应该能包得住你那二百多斤的身躯.......你就将就将就吧!.......这可是纯天然公害的绿色产品哟.......看看,还是我对你好吧,实话告诉你,我对我自己都没有这么好过.......”

大伟笑着对石头说道.....

......石头看了看,打量了一下荷叶,眼珠一转,想了想........眼下也没有什么办法,只能这样了.....于是夺过荷叶,以迅雷不及掩耳之速,连忙给包住,就这熟练程度,一看就是老手了,平时估计没少干........一边走,还一边回头看大家有没有再偷看他......真的是尴尬不已,丑态百出.....在大家的一片嘲笑声中,石头狼狈不堪的朝家跑去.......

待石头跑远后......大伟一抬脚,大家才发现,那条刺眼的粉色米老鼠的内裤正被大伟紧紧地踩在脚下,原来,石头被拉上岸的时候,速度太快,直接被蹭掉在了地上......石头跟本就没反应过来,于是趁大家不注意,大伟就踩在了脚下........

大家看到这,都心领神会,纷纷的竖起了大拇指........

小燕早就抱着小虎回家去了....

大伟一回头,没想到,在人群中,看到了那个他最不愿意看到的人,那一双阴森的眼睛正盯着自己,让人不寒而栗......

浑身湿透了的大伟不禁打了个寒战......

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